Reclusive Australian copywriter who’s worked with some of Australia’s biggest brands watches in horror as a horde of clients descends upon him … until he realises they’re from elBenbo’s email list, and reluctantly throws out a Ben-Settle-style headline:
“Look, I don’t do ‘free consults’, and I hate giveaways. But YES, the rumours are true: since all my clients started working with me …
“They sure have
… okay, not literally (my clients are responsible parents).
Point is, there’s a reason I’ve been lauded as “the best damn marketer in Australia”, and been responsible for more than $20 million in sales.
And that’s precisely why I’m not available for hire right now. But to find out when I might be, read on …
What’s the rush, cobber? Before you get the low-down on my services, this is your chance to get on my free DAILY mailing list, where you can witness the teachings of elBenbo in motion as I share my best copywriting tips … with a hilarious ‘Australian’ twist. (Trust me, my very first welcome email is very … polarising.)
You wanna do the deal? Then put your email address here, son:
Good. Goooooood. That’s the way.
Now, as you were …
Hang on a second …
Just who is this crazy
Aussie copywriting upstart?
The name’s Daniel. Daniel Throssell. That’s me there in the picture. (No, not the white one. That is a “kangaroo”.)
Here’s what you need
to know about me:
- I’m a freelance copywriter who does sales pages (like the one you’re reading now), and of course, emails (more on those below).
- Over the past few years, my campaigns have brought in multiple eight figures in revenue (tens of millions) for my various clients.
- Past & present clients include Mamamia (Australia’s largest independent women’s media empire), Naturenetics (a massive Australian supplement company), and The Barefoot Investor (Australia’s #1 bestselling author & most-trusted finance expert — who called me “the best damn marketer in Australia”).
- I regularly work with clients with (engaged!) email lists of hundreds of thousands, so your list size doesn’t scare me.
- To this day, I have one of the most ripped-off profiles on the world’s largest freelancing platform, after becoming one of the highest-paid writers on Upwork in my first 12 months on the site several years ago.
Oh, what’s that? Changed your mind on joining my list after seeing that my ‘deal’ was ‘the real’? Well, gadzooks! There is an opt-in box right here! What luck!
Better do it now — it’ll be your last chance for a while.
Now, back to me …
What do I write?
Well, I do my own daily emails to my list, where I share my best copywriting tips. (I’m influenced by Email Players for sure — but, I was doing profitable emails for clients long before I read Email Players, and I’m partial to my my own particular ‘style’, which I have never seen any other copywriter using.)
But I write those for my own business, obviously.
For clients, I build sales funnels — particularly, sales pages (like this one) and sales emails (like those you’ll see if you join my list).
I also have plenty of experience in doing market research, and product development for online courses.
But I try to stay out of too much else.
All right, then. Here’s the money shot …
How can you hire me?
And the answer is:
I’m booked on serious projects till July (and that doesn’t include the two projects I’m discussing now, or any work for my own business, of which there is plenty).
But after that?
(Although you’ll need to be on my client waitlist to even find out.)
But, I don’t really want people asking about working with me before they’re already sold on me.
So with that in mind:
Let’s do something
that’ll upset everyone
(elBenbo included) …
Psst! It’s me again. The opt-in guy. Daniel told me not to come back till a little later, but I saw you getting kinda edgy there. It’s okay. Just gimme the email address while he’s not looking and I’ll go sneak you on the list after work when he’s gone home …
Thanks! Okay, um, where was his copy at before I interrupted … ah, that’s right … he was about to do something to upset everyone:
My Refreshing No-Freebie,
Last week Ben sent this advice to all the copywriters advertising in his email:
“You get … a maximum of 40 words to say whatever you want to sell yourself — I suggest a USP that promises something only you can offer or only you are willing to offer.”Ben Settle
But in this case, I’ve decided to SPURN elBenbo — and not offer anything.
(I honestly have to wonder about people who can afford to give away their time for free — are they not busy with actual work? I know I am.)
Thus, there will be no offer of free ‘15-minute consults’ or ‘sales page reviews’ or ‘book giveaways’ here.
Huh? You look unimpressed.
Infuriating the freebie-seekers is the Email Players way, right?
But cheer up, Chadwick.
I’ll make you a deal:
I will not leave you totally high and dry here.
If you might be interested in working with me (or you’re a copywriter stalking me — yes, I see you), I hereby grant you the privilege of …
Joining my daily
“B-but why would I want to be on another daily email list?” you burble. “I’m already on Ben’s, and … that would make TWO emails a day!”
I stare at you for a second.
“Why … yes, yes it would,” I say with a forced smile, nodding slowly as I gently pat you on the shoulder.
Look, I could try ‘selling’ my list to you here. And maybe in theory I should, for maximum conversions.
But to be honest, I’m growing a little suspicious of you.
We’re this far down the page, and you haven’t joined … which makes me think you’re a procrastinator. And I don’t like procrastinators. Especially ones who end up trying to hire me.
So let’s lay down some rules here and make sure we’re both clear on whether this is going to work …
Thou shalt NOT
join my list if:
- Thou art not willing to get daily emails without unsubscribing like a wimp. (Of course, it’s on me to make them fun to read. Leave that to me.)
- Thou wantest to work with me “now” and cannot wait (since, as I have clearly said, I’m already booked, and you will need to be on my waitlist)
- Thy business is in a market that I deem unethical or dodgy — sex, pornography, drugs, scams, lotteries, gambling, ‘miracle cures’, magical gemstones, “buy this stock and get rich this year” newsletters, harnessing the ‘power of the universe’, or wildly alternative medicine. My rule of thumb: if I wouldn’t pitch it to my mum, I won’t write copy for it
- Thy business is in a market that I just don’t like — left-wing ideology, politics (either direction), radical feminism, or anything that makes me uncomfortable as a conservative Christian (nothing personal, I just can’t write you great copy if I can’t get behind your mission)
- Thou art a copy snob — meaning you like boring, professional, ‘best-practice’ copy; and entertaining (and downright weird) headlines like the Ben-Settle-inspired lead on this page make you uncomfortable
- Thou hast a cheap offering (less than ~$200), UNLESS you also have a huge list and can sell it at scale, otherwise I’m probably not going to be worth my fee
- Thou art a cheap person, and you don’t like paying for good copy and good service from a freelancer who works hard and meets deadlines
- Thou art a copywriter who just wants to stalk my copy without buying any of the products I have in the works (I’m not a charity, man, I’ve got kids to feed).
join my list if:
- Thou desirest an Email Players-inspired copywriter you can actually hire (someday, if you’re willing to pay him well and he actually likes your business).
- Thou hast a good, ethical business selling a good product that helps people.
- Other than Ben, thou art also a fan of Matt Furey, John Carlton, Scott Pape and/or Ramit Sethi. (I subscribe to and like all of them too. We’ll get along.)
- Thou art not a wimp with thy marketing and are happy to try pushing the envelope and being entertaining, edgy and at times aggressive in the name of making the sale.
- Bonus points if thou art in any niches I am personally interested in: language learning (especially Japanese my ONE TRUE LOVE), bodyweight fitness, Chrisitanity, memorisation (especially Bible and poetry), copywriting, marketing, cycling, songwriting, music creation or production. An esoteric list for sure. Not required at all, but I’d get excited if you were.
- Thou art a copywriter who wants to level up their freelancing game (after all, I did start from scratch, dominated Upwork for a year, then moved on to bigger and better things, so I know a thing or two).
make your choice.
I feel a little icky that I just wrote 1,500 words to try and get you onto a free email list. It almost feels … needy. (My only consolation is that at least I’m showing off my sales page skills, too.)
Anyway, let’s end this.
If you want to know when I’ve got an opening so you can hire me — or if you want to read my emails and learn from me — you simply need to get on my list.
When you do, don’t forget to confirm by clicking the link in the confirmation email. It bewilders me how many people can’t work that out and then email me asking why they aren’t getting anything.
Then again, if someone’s not smart enough to do that, maybe we’re not a great fit …
But, I believe in you. You can do this. Just enter your email below: