Real pitch I got on Facebook a while back.
What do you score this out of ten?
Hello Daniel, I am from Bangladesh. I seen your upwork profile. You are top freelancer in upwork. You can give any work my hourly rate is only 4 USD. I am expert in Internet research, lead generation etc.
Your score, Daniel?
I give it a 3/10 …
… because he spelt my name right, and correctly recognised that I was indeed Top Freelancer in Upwork.
(Although please use my formal term, “The Most Ripped-Off Copywriter on Upwork” … I like the ring of that better.)
Okay, jokes aside.
Picking on a pitch like this is cheap … it’s too easy a target.
But here’s the real reason I bring this up, Daniel.
If I asked my email list right now:
“How would you improve this pitch? Reply and let me know.”
I’d get a bunch of replies.
I know, because I’ve done this sort of thing before.
They’d say things like:
“He should do a bit more research on you first.”
“Don’t try and sell on price.”
“Include some samples.”
“I would use scarcity to increase the stakes and pressure you into getting back to him in time.”
(Seriously, I swear there is always that one rookie copywriter on my list who somehow thinks “scarcity” is the answer to EVERY SINGLE COPYWRITING CHALLENGE I THROW DOWN)
But the answer is …
There is no fixing this pitch.
I can tell you now: there is almost NOTHING this guy could have sent me in a cold message on Facebook that could have persuaded me to give him work.
In other words, I could ask you the question … but it would be the wrong question.
And it would fool you into wasting your time thinking of answers that won’t move the needle.
The right question is:
“What would be a better way for this guy to get jobs than sending crappy cold Facebook pitches?”
But since both my kids have woken up, and Hayley’s about to leave for work, I don’t have time to answer that in today’s email.
(I am still scarred from the time my three-year-old Eli decided to puke all over the rug literally seconds before Hayley left … I need to be out there and ready)
The point is: are you asking yourself the wrong question?
Ponder that next time you feel ‘stuck’ in your business.
And if you would like help in your biz asking the ‘right’ questions … and getting answers for them?
It’s something I can help with.
(They don’t call me “the best damn marketer in Australia” for nothing 😎)
Although … unlike my Bangladeshi friend, my rate is a little more than 4 USD, so better watch out for that one.